But all I can do is hold the gown against my barely beating heart. It should cease. I love him. I am nothing without him. Nothing. I stand here for a...moment. I shall skip dinner. All I want is a drink: Something, anything to numb the pain. I walk down the stairs with a death grip on the gown and into the kitchen. Slowly, I open the refrigerator. The cool air feels so welcoming. I look around and fumble through the bottles: Whisky, Vodka, Bailey’s Irish Cream, and Wine. I like the idea of a. After her speech, I realized that this was all about me. I was a born submissive and I need to be dominated, put in place. So I wouldn't object to her control over me. It was only natural."I like how he fucks me like a cheap whore, how he treats me like a piece of shit. I love it when is in charge doing what he wants without regarding what I want or like. These turn me on more than anything else in my whole life. And when he let me I get the most fucking mind-blowing orgasms." Well, well.... "It looks so good on you, even better than onFriday." I hoped you would like it," I said. "I brought an outfit to wearhome." I held up the carry-all bag.Mandy took it from me and threw it to a corner of the room. "Forgetthat crap," she said. She stood a little closer to me. "Did you doyou own make-up?" she asked."Un huh," I said with a nod. "Did I do okay?" I needed her love andacceptance so much right then. She kissed me gently on my lips, andlicked them."Mmm ... tastes nice," she said.. I want to stop. Every day I want it to end, but there’s nothing for me out there. My family doesn’t want me. But I want to go home. I really do.’ He stood there, waiting for someone to respond. Nothing came. The steps back to his seat were hard. He thought to himself that if nobody said a word, he would move to another city. Start over. But it wasn’t to be. Lene’s voice halted him. ‘It’s not that easy, Ian. Say those words to us again in six months if you have the balls. Show us you can clean.
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